Dog stick? You are such a girlie girl! It's dog squeeze. See how much more descriptive it is? It's also multi applicable and serves as a cover all in casual conversation.
"This martini tastes like dog squeeze."
"Obama...that guy...I swear every time he opens his mouth nothing but dog squeeze comes out."
"Yes your honor, I punched that protestor. he threw fuggin' dog squeeze at me."
Honestly, what can't dog squeeze do?