Laptop Life

[Aaron Burr]

Laptop=Gay.

That's pretty much the theme of this post. My computer is in the shop so I'm using the work laptop. I've noticed a couple of things.

1. The site page (here) displays funny on a laptop. Stuff is scrunched together and the merchandise moving picture box kajigger is below the logo instead of on the right hand side of the page near the top. Which makes me wonder how the page displays on non gold encrusted 72 inch monitors. Idly, of course as I don't really care about people who lack gold encrusted 72 inch monitors.

2. Looking at the site on another monitor is like looking at the site at someone else's house. I feel like a peeping Tom.

3. This new, somewhat more objective perspective forces me to confront the fact that I need to upgrade the site. Which of course entails a redesign of the merchandise line and some more ads...Which reminds me that I never got around to finishing the first ad campaign. Meh.

4. Number four is pretty much a recap of one through three plus the fact that I just don't like the interface with this laptop, which for my purposes will serve as a composite representing all laptops. Thus, as I previously stated, Laptop=Gay.


Oh, and I'm still reeling from the shock of seeing this.


The desire to go 160 miles an hour is clashing with my revulsion at the the sound of this thing. Gah.

Anyway. I'll start working at this place again tommorow. Meanwhile, I'm freed up to work on the comic book and load the first chapters of my ebook...to where ever it is you load them at. I'll let you know.

[Uncle Al]

Not all laptops are gay. I use a honkin' big 17" job with 1920x1080 screen resolution.
This site and others show up just fine as long as I maximize (or close to maximize) the browser window.

But you're right about the smaller ones.

[Ironsmith]

Gold encrusted monitor? Surely you gest jigger, a real EC rolls with a HR1920 diamond encrusted laptop. AL seems to know this already, what's up with the commoner approach to PC'ing with that low baller Au?

It's probably just swap meet Louie anyways...

[Uncle Al]

Word to the wise: Put the diamonds, rubies, and gold on the keyboard, not the outside which you should scratch up. Duct tape strategically placed as though it is holding the hinges together is also a good idea. Otherwise your laptop may never come out the other side of the TSA airport X-ray machine.

[Ironsmith]

TSA? You mean take a flight in a public airport, like commercial right? What in the hell is wrong with you guys today, have AB and our beloved Uncle Al been kidnapped?

Anybody here gotten a ransom request? I mean first it's Burr talking about low ball gold PC accoutrements and then AL has stopped flying private flights and made himself a victim to the TSA.

[Uncle Al]

TSA? You mean take a flight in a public airport, like commercial right? What in the hell is wrong with you guys today, have AB and our beloved Uncle Al been kidnapped?

Anybody here gotten a ransom request? I mean first it's Burr talking about low ball gold PC accoutrements and then AL has stopped flying private flights and made himself a victim to the TSA.

I fly commercial on occasion to keep up outward appearances of a "normal" "obedient" "regular" sports fan and therefore oblivious "citizen."

If you don't follow the expected pattern, the NSA and DHS [1] data miners look at you more closely. That's doubleplus ungood.


1. NSA = DHS = Heimatlandsicherheitdienst

[Ironsmith]

1. NSA = DHS = Heimatlandsicherheitdienst

What, you don't keep a plate of cookies and milk for those bastards if they ever come for a visit?

[Zonga]

1. Having your computer in the shop = gay

2. The site page (here) displays funny on a laptop Buy a clue! The site is supposed to be funny.

3. You don't have to upgrade for me. I like you just the way you are.

4. See #1

5. Gold, platinum, diamonds and assorted precious gems belong around my neck, dangling from my ears and encrusted around my fingers. Not (repeat NOT) on some fuggin computer.

6. My brother drove me around and around the track at Chrysler's Chelsea Proving Ground at 170 miles an hour in a Viper. That sounds sweet, doesn't it? neener

[Ironsmith]

[Mr. T]

Maybe the world is against you, or it is just the laptop nerds seeking out their revenge on you from the time when you made them pick cotton in the desert after you drank all of their wine coolers.