Critical Update

[Aaron Burr]

Dear ****

I am receiving information from **** (military) that Israel will attack Iran in the near term. Israel believes that Obama has abandoned them. Israel has recently made numerous appeals both directly and through third party countries asking that Obama come to Israel immediately only to be answered with silence. They will not notify the United States prior to the attack.

Additionally, the IDF is in a high state of readiness and is locating air defense systems in major cities.

I do not want to alarm anyone but simply provide information so that you will not be completely surprised.

Received 13:09 15/9/2012

This is from an unimpeachable source. Act accordingly.

May God bless and protect the nation of Israel as they prepare to stand alone against the world.



Editors note. Uh Oh.

[Aaron Burr]

This isn't the end of Iran. It's the beginning of a much broader active conflict that will embroil many nations in terror and war until the coming of the king of terror.

Who will most likely be a Chinaman. Anti-Japan protests in China swell, turn violent

Objectively speaking, one must admit that the way this is all coming together is simply fascinating. The mid east and parts of Yurrup are paralyzed with conflagration, the U.S. is focused on it's own sore vagina so Chiner' decides to bump heads with Japan. Am I missing anyone? How's Australia? We all know South America is fugged all the way up to Mesico' and I'm betting the Inuit are getting ready to burn something down at the Arctic circle, so who's left? The Russians? Don't they have their own vagina problems?

Of course a giant asteroid slamming into the earth might render all this planetary angst moot.




I fuggin' knew I wasn't going to get to see this years Fall Classic.

[AQuaintLife]

You didn't mention the solar flares. The cycle is due to peak this next year.

[spirit of Ronald Reagan]

Will our iPhone 5s ship in time to use them for a week or two before this happens?

[Aaron Burr]

I was sorta' off the record informished that we may or may not be looking at a 72 hour window. Which is spooky. See, normally they call up the IDF right away until the perceived threat subsides. This go around, they need the extra time to move heavy weapons around various cities. So it looks like they're getting ready for something big.

UPDATE: I see Australia has decided to join the party after all. G'day infidels!

[Aaron Burr]

Updating of the update: Armada of British naval power massing in the Gulf as Israel prepares an Iran strike

[AQuaintLife]

I was just wondering if you had seen that story.

[Aaron Burr]

I heard about it yesterday but wasn't allowed to say anything. Unlike Geraldo, I don't disclose our troop movements.

[Zonga]

so who's left?

The Gypsies are demonstrating against the French because the French are kicking them out but letting the Muzz stay.

Roma protest against French visit to Bucharest
12/09 17:22 CET

[Aaron Burr]

*Head hits desk.*